How to Write Your Book: A Step-by-Step Guide with EncouragementHave you ever felt that nagging urge to write a book? You’re not alone! Every day, I hear someone express that they should write a book but then never take the leap. The truth is, we all have stories to tell—each of us with our unique journeys. So, how do you get started?
Step 1: Find Your WhyBefore you begin, ask yourself: Why do you want to write a book? Is it to share your experiences, inspire others, or simply to get your thoughts out there? Understanding your motivation will help guide you through the process.
Encouragement: Your story matters! Embrace your unique perspective; it can resonate with others in ways you may not even realize.
Step 2: Outline Your JourneyOnce you know your “why,” it’s time to outline your book. Break your story into sections or chapters. This roadmap will help keep you organized as you write.
Encouragement: Don’t stress about making it perfect. Your outline can change as your story evolves!
Step 3: Set a Writing RoutineEstablish a regular writing schedule. Whether you write every day or a few times a week, consistency is crucial. Treat this time as sacred and stick to it.
Encouragement: Each writing session is a step closer to your goal. Celebrate those small wins!
Step 4: Just Start WritingWhen you sit down to write, let go of the need for perfection. Your first draft doesn’t have to be flawless; it just needs to be written. Allow your ideas to flow freely.
Encouragement: Remember, every author starts somewhere. The important thing is to get your thoughts on paper!
Step 5: Revise and EditAfter completing your first draft, take a break before revising. When you return, look for areas that need improvement—be it clarity, structure, or grammar. Don’t hesitate to seek feedback from friends or fellow writers.
Encouragement: Revising can be challenging, but it’s where your story truly begins to shine. Embrace the process!
Step 6: Consider Professional HelpIf you’re serious about publishing, think about hiring an editor or proofreader. They can provide valuable insights and help refine your manuscript.
Encouragement: Investing in your writing is a sign of commitment. Professional feedback can make a big difference!
Step 7: Publish Your WorkNow comes the exciting part: sharing your book with the world! Research your publishing options—whether traditional or self-publishing—and choose what feels right for you.
Encouragement: This is your moment! Your voice deserves to be heard, and publishing is your way to share it.
Step 8: Promote Your BookOnce your book is out there, it’s time to promote it! Use social media, local events, or book signings to connect with readers. Building a community around your writing can be incredibly rewarding.
Encouragement: Engaging with your audience can lead to meaningful connections. Enjoy the journey of sharing your work!
Final ThoughtsWriting a book is an adventure filled with ups and downs. Be patient with yourself and relish each step of the process. You have a story worth telling, and the world is ready to listen. Remember, every writer started just like you—dreaming of that first chapter. So, take a deep breath, pick up that pen (or keyboard), and begin your journey. You’ve got this! Happy writing!

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When the body experiences trauma, it often disrupts the mind-body connection. Trauma can cause a person to disconnect from their body in various ways, such as feeling numb, dissociated, or overly vigilant to perceived threats. This disconnection happens because the body holds onto the trauma and engages in a "fight, flight, or freeze" response. The mind, in turn, may try to avoid revisiting the painful experience, leading to a lack of awareness or connection to physical sensations.
Mind-Body Connection in Trauma:

1. Hyperarousal and Hypoarousal: After trauma, the body may get stuck in a state of heightened arousal (hyperarousal), leading to anxiety, hypervigilance, or irritability. Alternatively, it may go into hypoarousal, characterized by numbness, depression, and disconnection.
   
2. Somatic Memory: The body stores trauma physically, often referred to as "body memory." Even when the mind blocks out certain traumatic memories, the body might still react as if the trauma is ongoing. This can show up as physical pain, tension, or involuntary reactions.
   
3. Disconnection from the Body: People who experience trauma might lose the ability to accurately sense their body or understand physical cues (hunger, fatigue, etc.). This is part of the mind's defense mechanism to avoid revisiting painful experiences.
   

Exercises for Reconnecting the Mind and Body:Reconnecting the mind and body after trauma often involves somatic therapy, mindfulness, and body-awareness exercises. Here are some approaches:

1. Body Scan Meditation: This mindfulness practice helps to increase awareness of physical sensations and re-establish a sense of connection to the body. You can do this by mentally scanning each part of the body, noticing areas of tension or discomfort without judgment.
   
2. Breathing Exercises: Focusing on slow, deep breaths can help bring attention back to the body and calm the nervous system. Diaphragmatic breathing and "4-7-8 breathing" (inhale for 4 seconds, hold for 7, exhale for 8) are particularly useful for grounding.
   
3. Yoga: Trauma-sensitive yoga practices focus on reconnecting with bodily sensations and help build awareness and tolerance of physical feelings. Gentle movements, combined with breathwork, are often effective in releasing stored tension.
   
4. Progressive Muscle Relaxation (PMR): This involves tensing and relaxing different muscle groups to create a stronger sense of body awareness and reduce muscle tension caused by trauma.
   
5. Grounding Techniques: These techniques help pull the mind away from flashbacks or intrusive thoughts by focusing on the body and the present moment. Grounding exercises might include feeling the floor beneath your feet, focusing on the texture of objects, or engaging the senses with scents or sounds.
   
6. Dance or Movement Therapy: Expressive movement allows trauma survivors to release tension, express emotions, and reconnect with their bodies in a creative and freeing way.
   
7. Somatic Experiencing: This therapy involves tracking physical sensations and gently working through the physical effects of trauma without overwhelming the nervous system. A trained therapist often guides the process, helping clients recognize how trauma manifests in their body.
   
8. Tapping (EFT): Emotional Freedom Technique, or tapping, involves tapping on certain meridian points on the body while focusing on emotions or thoughts tied to trauma. This can help release blocked energy and emotions.
   

These exercises can slowly reintegrate the mind and body, helping someone heal from trauma by re-establishing a sense of safety and control over their physical and emotional state.

This is the 10 min yoga I did this morning
Yoga with Kassandra
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nDqIXo3qWk0

​Always love and peace throughout your day.

Understanding Codependency: Recognizing the Signs and Finding Solutions
Codependency is a term often used in the context of relationships, but what does it truly mean? At its core, codependency involves an unhealthy reliance on another person for validation and self-worth. This can occur in romantic relationships, family dynamics, friendships, and even work environments. Recognizing the signs of codependency is the first step toward fostering healthier, more balanced relationships.
What is Codependency?Codependency is a behavioral condition where one person enables another's addiction, poor mental health, immaturity, irresponsibility, or under-achievement. Among the hallmarks of codependency is an excessive need to care for others, often at the expense of one's own well-being. This dynamic can create a cycle of dependency that is difficult to break.
Common Signs of Codependency

1. Low Self-Esteem: Codependent individuals often struggle with low self-esteem and seek validation through others. They may feel unworthy or inadequate and believe that they need to be needed to feel valuable.
   
2. People-Pleasing: Codependents tend to go to great lengths to please others, even if it means compromising their own needs or values. They might find it hard to say no and may feel guilty or anxious when they do.
   
3. Poor Boundaries: Healthy relationships require clear boundaries, but codependent individuals often have trouble setting and maintaining them. They might feel responsible for other people's feelings and problems, leading to enmeshment and loss of personal identity.
   
4. Caretaking: Taking care of others can become a way to feel in control or needed. While helping others is not inherently bad, codependents often take it to an unhealthy extreme, neglecting their own needs in the process.
   
5. Control Issues: Codependent individuals may try to control others to keep things running smoothly. This can manifest as manipulation, guilt-tripping, or even passive-aggressive behavior.
   
6. Denial: Many codependent people are in denial about their own needs and emotions. They might focus on others' problems to avoid dealing with their own feelings of inadequacy or pain.
   

Causes of CodependencyCodependency often stems from childhood experiences. Growing up in an environment where emotional needs were not met or where one had to care for an ill or dysfunctional family member can set the stage for codependent behaviors. These patterns can carry into adulthood, affecting all types of relationships.
Breaking the Cycle of Codependency

1. Self-Awareness: The first step to overcoming codependency is recognizing and acknowledging the behavior. Self-reflection and honest assessment of your relationships can help you identify codependent patterns.
   
2. Establishing Boundaries: Learn to set and maintain healthy boundaries. This involves understanding your limits and communicating them clearly to others. It’s okay to say no and prioritize your own needs.
   
3. Seeking Professional Help: Therapy can be incredibly beneficial for those struggling with codependency. A therapist can help you explore the root causes of your behavior, develop healthier coping mechanisms, and build self-esteem.
   
4. Developing Self-Esteem: Work on building your self-esteem independent of others’ validation. Engage in activities that make you feel good about yourself and practice self-compassion.
   
5. Learning to Let Go: Letting go of the need to control others is crucial. Focus on what you can control—your actions and reactions. Trust others to handle their own problems and allow yourself to step back.
   
6. Building Healthy Relationships: Aim to cultivate relationships based on mutual respect and support rather than dependency. Surround yourself with individuals who respect your boundaries and encourage your growth.
   

ConclusionCodependency is a complex and often deeply ingrained behavior, but with awareness and effort, it is possible to break free from its grip. By recognizing the signs and taking proactive steps toward healthier relationships, you can foster a more balanced and fulfilling life. Remember, it’s never too late to seek help and start making positive changes. Your well-being and happiness are worth it.

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Welcome to "Unleashing Creativity: Exploring Fresh Ideas for Your Daily Life." In this blog, we will embark on a journey of inspiration and imagination, delving into a wide range of innovative ideas to enhance various aspects of your life. Whether you're seeking inspiration for personal growth, professional development, hobbies, or simply looking to infuse more creativity into your routine, this blog is your go-to resource. So, let's dive in and unlock the door to endless possibilities!

1. Nurturing Mindfulness in Everyday Moments: Discover simple yet powerful techniques to cultivate mindfulness in your daily life. Explore mindfulness exercises, breathing techniques, and mindful habits that can bring calm, clarity, and a renewed sense of presence to your day.
2. Embracing a Minimalistic Lifestyle: Explore the beauty and simplicity of minimalism. Learn how to declutter your physical and mental spaces, simplify your routines, and find contentment in the essentials. Find inspiration to create a serene and purposeful environment that promotes focus, productivity, and overall well-being.
3. Revamping Your Productivity: Discover practical strategies and tools to boost your productivity and make the most of your time. Explore time management techniques, task prioritization methods, and goal-setting approaches to help you accomplish more while maintaining a healthy work-life balance.
4. Unleashing Your Inner Chef: Delve into the culinary world and experiment with new recipes and flavors. Explore creative cooking techniques, innovative ingredient combinations, and tips for meal planning and preparation. Elevate your culinary skills and impress your family and friends with your gastronomic delights.
5. The Art of DIY: Unleashing Your Creative Potential: Unleash your inner artist by exploring various do-it-yourself (DIY) projects. From home decor and crafting to upcycling and personalizing everyday items, discover ways to express your creativity and add a touch of uniqueness to your living spaces.
6. Adventure Awaits: Outdoor Explorations and Travel: Embrace the spirit of adventure and explore the world around you. Discover hidden gems in your local area, plan exciting road trips, or embark on international journeys. Find inspiration for hiking, camping, photography, and more, as we encourage you to step out of your comfort zone and embrace the beauty of nature.
7. Mind-Body Connection: Exploring Holistic Wellness: Uncover the power of holistic wellness approaches that integrate the mind, body, and spirit. Dive into practices such as yoga, meditation, aromatherapy, and self-care rituals to nurture your overall well-being and promote a harmonious balance in your life.
   ​ "Unleashing Creativity: Exploring Fresh Ideas for Your Daily Life" aims to ignite your imagination and inspire you to explore new possibilities in various areas of your life. By embracing creativity, mindfulness, productivity, and holistic wellness, you can embark on a journey of self-discovery and personal growth. Stay tuned for regular updates filled with exciting ideas and practical tips to help you live a more fulfilling and vibrant life. Let's unleash our creativity together!

By Laura Mass
Reviewed By: Jennifer Peacock-Vauthrin R.P.C. M.P.C.C.

Every one of us have emotional triggers but when and where did they begin? Surprisingly, these triggers rarely spontaneously occur. They are cued by a spark of intense emotional reaction, to something in our internal (thoughts or feelings) or external (stressful event) environment. Emotional triggers are associated with varying degrees of post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) – I.e. from a small child being abandoned to the stress of soldiers of war. They are not bound by time, age, sex, religion, nor lifestyle; they are suppressed emotional wounds.

Because of the emotions can be uncomfortable or even paralyzing, by identifying, naming, and learning specific coping skills, we can take steps to limit the full impact of those triggers. Let us take the opportunity to “check-in” with ourselves, reflect, get the help we need and be provided with managing skills to move forward to reclaim your life – on your terms, not the emotions.

For the change to take place within us, we need to be open to seeing things differently. I know it maybe difficult, however, let take a step back from the emotions and truly focus on the triggers. Here we will learn “Identify the triggers” and “Triggers for growth”.

Emotional energy itself is neutral. It is the feeling sensation and physiological reaction, which makes a specific emotion positive or negative. The feeling itself is what one labels as anger, sadness, joy or fear. It is then that the interpretations or thoughts about the emotional energy which give it meaning. It is the emotions which serves as the carrier of these waves for the entire spectrum of feelings. By understanding that emotions are energy, this implies that they are fluid, always moving, meant to be felt and released. If the energy is suppressed and ignored, the true culprit originates from low emotional intelligence and stress burnout – in other words, the inability to accurately perceive emotions, in both yourself and others.
 
Below is a guide which you will do for straight 7 days, I will ask that you email me, at [email protected], your main trigger and we will then book a free consultation for after your 7 days.    

​Of course, it takes time and practice to learn how to transform the triggers into something positive. Doing the cognitive work does pays off. By addressing the triggers and discovering a new way to relate to them, we can drastically reduce their occurrences because you will start to heal the root wound that caused them in the first place. 
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Learning from your triggers and growing because of them is a natural process. That means, when it doesn’t feel right, don’t push yourself to address your triggers head on. Again, creating space and learning how to re-associate with your triggers is key. Go slowly and remember that the work you do will benefit everyone, including those you love the most.

Eating disorders - what's that voice in my head saying?
 
Reviewed By: Jennifer Peacock-Vauthrin R.P.C. M.P.C.C.
 
Do you have this overwhelming urge to listen to that “eating disorder voice”? “If I eat that sandwich, I’ll need to exercise for 2 plus hours!” or “I love the taste of food so much, that I stuff myself and need to quietly need to get rid of it by throwing up.” What if the voice whispers, “Oh my gosh, this hamburger tastes sooo good, I need another one…or maybe two?” Whether it’s someone who refuses who eat, regurgitates food, loves eating, or influenced by the media about their body image - they all have three things in common: They cannot stop thinking of food, learned unhealthy behaviors, and over time their health will deteriorate.  
 
Now, let us peel back a deeper layer: Do you hide it from friends and family members? What tricks have you learned to hide your secret? Realizing, “wait, do I have an issue with food?”
 
Eating disorders don’t discriminate between sex or age, although it is more prevalent among young women (3.8%) then men (1.5%) in the US as of 2001-2004 (Journal of the American Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry, 2010). It’s interesting to note that the disorders usually develop during puberty. Then there are psychological, environmental, and social factors that may contribute to the disorder. There are many reasons which are associated with eating disorders.
 
Some common signs of eating disorders that affect one’s health:
 

• Obsessing over weight, dieting and calories intake
• Being uncomfortable eating around others and food
• Changes in moods

 
Physical signs:
 

• Stomach and throat issues
• General weakness
• Dental and skin issues

 
The first step is to acknowledge what is happening to you – mentally and physically.
 
The next step can seem very difficult: Talking to someone. In some cases, friends or family become concerned and speak with you; and hopefully you are open to truly listen to them. These special people in your life are there to support you, before, during and after receiving professional support.
 
Depending on the severity of the eating disorder, this is where you can start a dialog and work with your counsellor, doctor or specialist. Most people will begin with a counsellor who is compassionate, understanding, and patient. Personally, I focus on not only the person but ensuring the person feels that they are in a safe place to speak freely. I am unjudgmental and am here to specifically learn about you. By understanding your background, wants and needs, it guides me to ask reflective questions. I can then provide tools to assist you in manage the anxiety, stress, and decrease the negative thoughts. In some cases, people have unconsciously buried things that really affected them that it was just too unbearable to carry with them.
Let’s work together starting today and the life you truly deserve – towards a brighter future!
 
Let’s chat!

Depression - Are you stuck? Are you tired of being in a rut?
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Reviewed By: Jennifer Peacock-Vauthrin R.P.C. M.P.C.C.
 
To define depression is one thing, to live with it can be debilitating.
 
It is estimated that 15%-20% of the adult population will experience one form or another of depression at some point in their lifetime. Depression maybe caused by one factor alone or a combination of factors. These factors include biological, psychological, and even environmental factors.
 
When one feels a form of stress, the person fully acknowledges the mind and body connection, so to with depression. The mental illness does not discriminate whether the person is a child, adolescent, young adult, adult or senior. It is how we work through theses stages that determine the outcome.
 
Mental health can be triggered by very stressful like situations or other factors as:

• Death of a friend or family member
• Financial difficulties or job loss
• Social isolation
• Relationship conflicts
• Stressful workplace, workload, or prolonged working hours
• Health issues, typically related to chronic health struggles

 
The good news is that depression can be controlled with working with professionals who a) teach psychological tools and b) depending on the severity, prescribing medication.
 
The persons sensitivity of depression includes feelings of being unable to enjoy life, feelings of despair and hopelessness, perpetual crying, unable to think of anything but feelings being very raw and deep, and either overeats or stops eating. One of the many coping mechanisms is to “sleep off” the feelings.
 
When we are so focused on ourselves, it can be easy to forget that there are people that are there to listen, help and provide information of the varying support systems; counsellors, doctors, social workers, facilitated free groups, and keep in mind that there are people who relate to how you are feeling and, in turn, may need you as much as you need them.
 
Although reaching out may feel like the hardest step and scary, I know you can do it. The rest you can get through with connecting with people and specialist that you resonate and have a good rapport with.
 
When you are ready, I am here to listen and speak with. Contact me by phone, email, text. I will guide you and walk the mile with you. Be ready because this experience will increase your confidence, provide you with greater peace of mind and happiness, feeling safer in the world and increase the quality of your life. You may even be able to guide others that are going through similar experiences. I will not only teach you to live outside of the box that you have fallen into but will teach you tools that will free you from the negativity. The rest is up to you.
 
If you’re ready to kick butt then let’s chat! Let’s make this happen. Let’s get you onto the next chapter in your life!!

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Anxiety - can you relate?

Have you felt your heart rate increasing? Are you feeling panicky? What about sweaty palms, having issues concentrating or constantly feeling anxious? You may have your own tools of trying to calm your mind and body, but it has its hold on you. The only safe place you think is home, where it is safe, and you can avoid the outside world; then bam! The cycle anxiety begins again.

Although anxiety is a normal part of one’s life, when feelings of anxiety and panic overwhelming interfere with the persons daily activities, the person needs help. The thoughts and feelings are difficult to control, fears are amplified, the concern lasts for several hours, and the body experiences uncomfortable physical symptoms.

We all have experienced different levels of anxiety throughout our lives and handle stresses differently. For instance, a family member passes away and a person with anxiety prioritizes the things that must be done – they seem to be completely in control. They are capable and able to take care of others but not necessarily themselves. In many cases, people who experience a traumatic event, either think they can manage on their own or do not seek help from their immediate support system...until the mental state triggers become present. By taking care of ourselves, both mentally and physically, we can work through the causes or triggers. In some cases, with medication.

When anxiety knocks, the person begins to spiral into a deep depression, and their life becomes overwhelming and debilitating. Many of us don’t stop and acknowledge the pain and feelings, we suppress them instead; the person just exists, not living their life.

By avoiding or replacing their anxiety, the anxiety manifests the person into becoming a workaholic, an alcoholic, a gambler, an over achiever, a perfectionist, or in numerous other unhealthy ways. For example, a father will burry himself in his work and lash out at the staff. Why? Because this person feels the traumatic life event feels out of their control. Although that person is making the choice not their own, they will avoid not facing and looking at or within themselves. When we are not looking at the overwhelming stress and the path that brought that us to where they are today, we are not taking advantage of learning tools to assist us to not only feel safe but to also take care of yourself.

Let’s work together to move past this chapter in your life, and on to the next.  Book your FREE consult today.
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Call, text, or email me: 604-315-2440 or [email protected]